Rich Procter: 'The 19% project ? we can do it!'

Rich Procter: 'The 19% project ? we can do it!'
Contributed by drprocter on Monday, November 14 @ 09:59:50 EST


Even my fellow insurrectionists called me a crazy dreamer when I told them that we - the American People, working together in a bipartisan fashion - could get President Bush's approval numbers below 40%. Dreamer? Try visionary. Today, even Dubya-friendly Fox News has Bush at 36% and plummeting. A clear majority of Americans believe Mr. Bush has the integrity of a crack dealer. They also think the Iraq war is a debacle, and that Team Bush has our young soldiers being blown up for no good reason.

QUESTION - Will our War President? bottom out in the mid-30th percentile, or can he actually tumble lower? Call me a glass-half-full cockeyed optimist, but I think we can get Dubya down to 19%. How? I've created a comprehensive 4 Point Plan to ensure that Mr. Bush will become the first President less popular than Herpes. My plan requires the (unintentional, unconscious) assistance of Republicans. I don't see this as a problem.

POINT ONE - The President Must Continue To Act Brain Dead and Tone Deaf On Iraq - Bush's huffy, snappish Veterans' Day speech executes this strategy perfectly - more please! Instead of acknowledging his myriad blunders, taking responsibility for the on-going calamity, telling the truth and offering a new direction, Mr. Bush told America that things were peachy-keen swell, and called the Democrats big poopy-heads for admitting that he lied to them so he could have his war. Excellent! Here's a real "19 per center" in action - isolated, petulant, and dangerously deluded.



POINT TWO - The White House Must Continue To Misjudge Every Crisis As Mere Fodder for P.R. "Spin." - Katrina was the perfect paradigm for how a true 19 per center responds to an emergency. First, ignore it (and if possible, have your picture taken grinning at fund-raisers while people die). Next, sky in for "toe touch" photo op in order to go into raptures over the incompetent crony who is botching emergency relief operations. Finally, flail about trying to find a properly picturesque Morgan Freeman look-alike to hug, to show voters that you really truly care as horror stories dominate the media. BONUS STEP - Go prime time with a "White House Presents George Bush LIVE from New Orleans!" very special special. Vow to do "whatever it takes" to help New Orleans. Go back to Washington and lose interest immediately. Wonderful! 19% here we come!

POINT THREE - Bush Must Continue to Champion Rampant Hypocrisy - I believe this is our single BEST weapon in our "crusade" (one of Dubya's favorite words!) to get him down to 19%. Consider:
"We do not torture" (Abu Gharib, Gitmo, Secret Euro-Prisons, Cheney lecturing McCain, etc., ad nauseum)
"Ah'm a Conservative" (Drunken Sailor Spending Binges, Zero Vetoes, "Bridge to Nowhere", Patriot Act destruction of privacy rights, record deficits, etc., ad nauseum)
"Restoring Honor and Dignity To Government" (Libby indictment, DeLay indictments, Frist investigation, Rove investigation, Abramoff corruption inquiry, etc. ad nauseum)
"Bring It On" - Over 2,000 soldiers have been sent to an early grave by a President from the "Vietnam Avoidance Brigade" of the Texas Air National Guard, and a Vice-President who bagged five draft deferments while pursuing "other priorities." These are the men who can't spare ten minutes for a woman who lost her son in Iraq.
POINT FOUR - The Bushies Must Keep Pushing Policies People Despise - We've made an excellent start here with the dazzling Bush campaign to "reform" Social Security. Who else but the Bushies could invent a plan that would A) add 3 trillion dollars to the national debt, while B) doing absolutely nothing to fix Social Security! BONUS - The more he explained it, the more people hated it! THIS is the Bush who will get to 19% all by his swaggerin' Texas self, without our help. This is the smug, arrogant, fiercely entitled millionaire plutocrat who treats voters like they're naughty servants.

What repugnant proposals are on the horizon? Well, Mr. Bush's right-wing echo chamber "Tax Reform Commission" has recommended prying the home mortgage tax deduction out of the cold dead fingers of the middle class. BEST IDEA YET! And these same Country Club Republicans were shocked to discover that some working Americans have health care provided by employers! Argh! They want to eliminate the tax break companies get to provide this insurance. Oh, and it turns out some billionaires are still forced to pay income tax, so the Bushies have more "Donald Trump Tax Relief" on the way to de-fund the government they despise, so they can run up the deficit even more.

What's next? Sell people their mail? (They'd call it "The Post Office Self-Sufficiency Income Enhancement Act of 2006")

Still think we can't get Mr. Bush to 19%? Ponder this - he has no more cards to play. He's destroyed the military, and he doesn't dare bring back the draft. He's busted the budget - no more Medicare-style boondoggles. With natural gas skyrocketing 50% this winter, shivering snow-belt voters have another reason to hate him. All he's got left are the tried and true Republican "Rile The Rubes" Evergreens:
"Homos Getting' Married! Amend the Constitution!
"Democratic Traitors Burning Flags! Amend the Constitution!"
"Mexicans Invading Our Borders! (Except For Them Bush-Approved Sub-Minimum Wage Wal-Mart Associates Willing To Work For Less Than Lazy Americans!) Shut Down Them Borders!"
Hmmmmmm...I'm starting to think 19% isn't ambitious enough. On to SINGLE DIGITS!